We Can Do This Together
by animefreak9898
Summary: Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes have been separated during the worlds worst disaster.. A zombie apocalypse. Steve will do what ever it takes to be with his best pal Bucky, but there's some trouble along the way for both of them. All alone Steve (and Bucky) is keeping a journal to tell his story. (AU, Post Serum Steve, No Hydra, It's gonna be sad sometimes.)
1. My Name Is Steve

_/_ _Hey guys! I love Stucky a lot and decided to write an AU zombie apocalypse fanfic with my two favorite guys. Please Read and Review!_ _ **And yes this is after the serum Steve. Don't want him being weak and dying now do we?**_

 **Warning:** This story will contain (I will give warning!) Male X Male situations. If you do not like it please don't read it.

 **ANOTHER WARNING: There will be death in this story and in this chapter as well. If you can not handle it I will put up a warning before it happens. And I shall tell when it over as well.**

 **Rated M:** Rated M for whenever the possible sexual situations come in. I don't want to get kicked off Fanfiction for putting the wrong rating.

 **Disclaimer:** I do NOT own any of the characters in this story. All ownership goes to the respected parties.

 _ **If something is bold and in Steve's Journal then he had meant to erase it**_

* * *

 _Chapter one:_ _My name is Steve_

He had been running all day and it was getting too dark out to see without a light, that would only attract more of them. Luckily he was able to get to the roof of a building safely. Sitting down the blond pulled a notebook out of his backpack.

* * *

 _Steve's journal: Entry 1_

' _I was alone. It has been weeks since I have seen another living person. I could be the last one left for all I know._

 _My name is Steven Grant Rogers, most people called me Steve. I'm writing this journal so I don't go insane being out here all alone. If anyone finds this after I'm gone I hope it will be helpful to you._

 _If you don't know what's going on let me give you the rundown._

 _A few months ago, that's right I said months. I was out with my best pal Bucky Barnes in the heart of Brooklyn._ _ **God that man** __…. Sorry I don't have an eraser left…. Anyway we went out like we did most nights of the week when he wasn't working over time at the docks. He found some girls like usual to take out dancing, we didn't make it to dance before it all happened._

 _On our way there was what felt like a miniature earthquake, it was no earthquake. There was a large lab nearby and something had caused an explosion. What ever they were working on is what caused all this…..Hold on. I hear something. I'll have to finish this later.'_

* * *

Steve got up from the roof to look for the noise. Suddenly the door to the stairs burst open. He didn't think he made to much noise but clearly he was wrong. Grabbing his bag and notebook Steve took off across the rooftop and to the next, and the next, and the next. He didn't stop until he was certain he was in the clear. Instead of going back to write he took this time to sleep.

* * *

 _Steve's journal: Entry 2_

' _Now I lost my train of thought. Sorry it's hard to sit and write for long with all this going on. Right back to the story, you don't even know what this is yet._

 _This… What I'm living in now, if you want to call it living. It's what you'd call the apocalypse. No not the one with the floods or the earthquakes. No this one has something much worse… Zombies._

 _I couldn't believe it at first either. After the explosion people including Buck and I ran to the building. We thought the man coming out was sick, someone tried to help him. That's when all hell broke loose. The man bit the other, just a bit chunk of skin straight off. It was terrifying._

 _People started to panic, to run, even to try and help the two men. That just made it worse. Those people got bit and started to bite anyone around them. It was horrible. The chaos it created separated Bucky and I. That was the last time I saw him…'_

* * *

Steve put the notebook in his backpack and stuffed the blanket in as well. He couldn't sit around all day he had to find food, and he was running low on ammunition. Slinging his backpack onto his shoulders Steve grabbed his gun and headed down from the rooftop.

Did it terrify him to travel through an unknown building that could be full of the undead? Of course!

Opening the door to the stairs Steve held his gun tightly as he made his way through the dimly lit halls. Opening a door to one of the floors Steve made sure to be as quiet as possible. But he couldn't help a smile that came to his face seeing an office. There were pictures of families on desks and.. And suddenly there was groaning.

Gripping his gun Steve ducked behind one of the desks taking a peek over it. There were only about five of them gathered at an office door. He could hear a child sobbing as well as a mother saying it would all be alright.

On one hand he could easily leave through the door without being heard. But he knew he couldn't do that. He couldn't leave anyone to die like this. Aiming his gun Steve took the first shot watching it drop to the floor.

To bad he hadn't been able to find a silencer, because that made the ring echo through the whole office building. Jumping up Steve quickly took the next shot, and the next. Two more to go.. But he was out of bullets!

Looking around Steve found a spilled box of bullets. Thank god whoever dropped them. Rushing over he grabbed two and quickly loaded the gun. Looking up to shoot he froze seeing one of the zombies directly in front of him.

With a shaky hand Steve pulled the trigger. "Fuck." He muttered as blood got on his clothing, at least it wasn't in his mouth. Aiming one last time Steve shot the gun watching as the last zombie fell to the floor.

Grabbing the box of bullets he stood up heading for the door. Knocking softly a sigh escaped his lips. "Excuse me miss.. It's alright they're taken care of."

Slowly the door opened a dark haired woman peaked out the door. "You haven't been bitten have you?"

Steve shook his head. "No ma'am I have not. Are you and your little girl alright?"

The woman smiled and opened the door, a little girl was clinging to her leg crying. "We're fine. Oh thank you so much!" She held out her hand for him. "My name is Laura Barton. We were separated from my husband and our sons. This is Lila." She motioned to her daughter, that's when Steve paled. Laura was pregnant!

"Steve Rogers, nice to meet you. Miss.. I'd like it if you came with me so I can make sure you're safe until we find your husband." He kneeled down to Lila a smile coming to his lips. "I'll keep you safe until we find your dad I promise." The little girl smiled rubbing at her eyes.

"Thank you Steve I would really appreciate that. If it weren't for you we could have been…"

"Don't say that." Steve stood up and pulled out the bullets to load his gun. "I won't let that happen I promise. We should get going. I was on my way to find some food."

* * *

Steve lead Laura and her daughter Lila from the building safely. He managed to find a gas station with food still left in it. He grabbed several slim jims, water, chips, and bread stuffing them into his backpack. Lila even had a bag of her own to put food into.

He was worried of course, Laura was at least six months pregnant and this could send her into an early labor. He had to be careful and make sure she didn't stress to much. But how could you not stress during an apocalypse?...

After eating and gathering supplies Steve lead the two into a nearby church. He used the benches to block off the doors and some windows. He pushed two of them together and laid his blanket over it to have Laura lay down and Lila take a nap.

Sitting against one of the benches Steve pulled out his journal to begin writing.

* * *

 _Steve's Journal: Entry 3_

' _Today has been quite the eventful day. I guess I'm not the last one left. I found a woman named Laura Barton and her daughter Lila. They're looking for her husband and son. Laura is quite pregnant and I'm not exactly sure what I need to do for her. But I will not let either of them die._

 _Back to what I was saying. It was the last time I ever saw Bucky. But that doesn't mean I've given up looking for him. Everytime I look at one of their faces or I pass a grave.. I look for him. And I'll never stop looking for him because I know he'd do the same for me, and he just may be._

 _We had a plan Buck and I. If anything bad were to ever happen and we got separated we would meet at his Paw's old place in Washington. Now I know what you're thinking, how far am I from Washington D.C.. Well I started out in Brooklyn where this all happened. I've gotten pretty far over the months. I know it's about 300 miles or so. If I had a car it would've been real quick. Sadly there is no car and I keep having to make detours because of all the dead. I have about 136 miles left. I'm currently in Philadelphia._

 _Anyway back to how this happened. After it spread throughout Brooklyn it just kept going and going. We couldn't stop it nor could we contain it. I heard from survivors I met long ago who're probably dead by now. That there is a camp in Illinois just outside Chicago that is living only. It may only be just a rumor but I'm gonna find Buck and take him there. I promise.'_

* * *

The next morning Laura wasn't feeling so well so Steve decided they would all just take a day to rest instead of going back out. He was alright with that, it gave him time to work on his journal.

* * *

 _Steve's Journal: Entry 4_

' _Now I realize I've been talking about Bucky a lot but I've never really told you who he or I am. Let's start with Bucky. He's.. Bucky is…_ ** _Bucky is amazing, perfect even_** _._ _Let's start from the beginning. Bucky and I met in elementary school, he used to find me getting beat up in alleys. I was real scrawny then but Buck showed me how to protect myself. Buck and I have been best friends since we were kids and always will be. He tells me all the time we're together until the end of the line._

 _Buck is real tall with nice dark hair. He's good with the ladies too but never seems to notice what's in front of him. Buck's the eldest of his three other siblings, and he's real good at sports too. Not to long ago Buck got into a bad accident and lost his arm. He's got a metal one now and he absolutely hates it, I tried to tell him all the time that it attracted girls to make him smile. He's really a true friend. If a girl blew me off he'd ignore 'em for me._

 _The truth is… Even if he would have set me up on a million dates none of those girls would have been right for me because… Because_ ** _I have been in love with Bucky since I could remember_** _._ __ _I'm just not interested in them._ ** _God he's just such an idiot! Before this happened why couldn't he see what he meant to me?! Bucky was everything to me, and still is. Even if he would have noticed it probably would have just cost me our friendship. Bucky's straight as a ruler.. He would hate me if he ever found out_ _._**

 _About me well.. I used to have to stare up at Bucky just to look him in the eyes. But I grew and now I'm a bit taller than he is. I have what people call dirty blond hair. Both Bucky and I are quite fit which comes in handy at a time like this. Who ever you are that's reading this there is a picture of Bucky and I taped on the back page of the notebook. I'm gonna find him…'_

* * *

Putting his notebook away Steve froze hearing the familiar groaning. "Laura?" Grabbing his gun Steve put on his backpack and stood up.

"I heard it too… Lila get your bag quickly!" Lila ran off to the back room to get her backpack. Suddenly she came back through the door screaming. Coming out of the doorway was one of the uglier ones. Its skin half hanging off, its lips peeled back to show nothing but its teeth, and the stench of blood and decay was heavy.

Quickly Laura grabbed Lila and covered her eyes while Steve shot it straight through its head. "Quickly lets go!"

Running to the door Steve shoved the bench out of the way. Of course he peeked outside first to make sure there were none around. Quickly he lead the two from the church and down one of the side streets, but that was a horrible idea.

* * *

 **-Upcoming Death-**

Usually the side streets had little to no zombies but that wasn't the case today. There had to be at least thirty of the ugliest creatures he had ever seen. There skin peeling off in different chunks. Blood dripping from their torn and stained clothing. The air around them smelt of death and decay.

Picking up Lila, Steve pulled out his gun and kept her head against his shoulder so she couldn't see. "Come on we have to move!"

They took off down the street Lila crying against Steve's shoulder. While running Laura slipped and fell down in front of the horde of the undead. Steve was going to run and help her up but a zombie took a large chunk out of her ankle.

Screaming out in pain she cried out to Steve. "Take Lila to the bell tower church on main street! Fuck! Her father promised to meet us there! Please! Please Steve shoot me! Please!" A blood curling scream left her throat as more joined in biting and tearing at her flesh.

Aiming his gun Steve couldn't watch as he pulled the trigger. Laura's screams stopped but the groaning continued. Quickly Steve took off holding a crying terrified Lila in his arms. "It's gonna be alright Lila I'm gonna get you to your dad. I promise."

 **-End Of Death Scene-**

* * *

"B-But my mommy!" Lila cried against Steve's shoulder as they got as far away from the horde as possible.

"I know and I'm sorry but I promise we'll get to your father!" Steve took several side streets trying to make sure no unwanted guests heard Lila's crying. He was glad when she finally passed out.

"I'm so sorry." Steve was mumbling to himself as Lila slept. "I'm so sorry I couldn't help her. I'm so sorry I couldn't keep you both safe."

* * *

It took Steve several hours and a few more bullets but he managed to get to the rooftop across from the bell tower church. He would be on the ground but the bell rang every hour on the hour, and it attracted a lot of unwanted attention.

Pushing open the door from the stairs Steve froze as a bow and arrow was pointed at his head. "Daddy!" Lila called out as she wiggled from Steve's arms and ran to her father.

Seeing his daughter the man put the bow down and kneeled down to hug her tightly. "Lila I was so worried about you! I'm so glad you're safe!"

Steve slowly came onto the roof shutting the door. That's when the man noticed him again and grabbed the bow and arrow. "Don't move!"

"No daddy wait!" Lila tugged at his arms to get him to put the bow down. "Mr. Steve helped me and mommy!"

"Mommy.. Lila where is your mommy!?" Lila lowered her eyes as they begun to tear up. Dropping his bow the man hugged his daughter tightly. "Oh Lila I'm so sorry. It's alright sweetie it's alright." Looking over at Steve he let out a soft sigh. "Were you with her when it happened?"

Steve nodded and walked over to the male kneeling down to be on his level with Lila. "Yes.. My name is Steve Rogers. I found your wife and daughter in an office and helped them except… This morning your wife she slipped in front of a horde.. Asked me to bring Lila here to you and to… Well.. Put her out of her pain." Steve looked down guilty before the man spoke up.

"I'm Clint Barton, thank you for taking care of my wife and my little girl." He motions to the boy behind him holding a baby. "That's Cooper and little Nathaniel."

Steve put on a bright smile. "It's nice to meet you Cooper. It has been a while since I've met anyone so it's nice to see some new faces."

Clint let out a deep yet sad laugh. "We.. We're heading to a camp outside of Chicago if you want to join us."

"Hmm? Oh thank you for the offer but I can't… I'm heading to Washington to find my friend Bucky. After I get him I'll find you at the camp." Clint smiled and pat Steve's shoulder.

"I hope you find him." Standing up Clint picked up Lila holding her close. "Come on we have to head out of the city by nightfall or we'll never make it. It was nice meeting you Steve. I hope we'll see each other again."

Steve nodded standing up. "I hope we do.. Goodbye Lila." He waved as they left. He himself had to get moving before the next hour struck or he'd be stuck on the roofto-...

The large bell begun to chime. Slowly the groaning got louder and louder, now Steve was stuck on the roof until they left when it was over.

Pulling out his blanket Steve sat down and got out his notebook, it would be a while until they all cleared out.

* * *

 _Steve's Journal: Entry 5_

' _The day hasn't gone so well so far. First of all…. We lost Laura today. I had only known her about a day but still it's upsetting. She had fallen in front of a horde we got caught up in. She had me end her suffering…_

 _I got Lila to her father and two brothers. They're heading to the camp outside of Chicago. Hopefully I'll meet up with them again once I find Bucky. And I WILL find Bucky, I promise. Now all I have to do is wait for the horde in front of the bell tower church to leave and I'll be on my way. I'll see you soon Buck… I promise you that.'_

* * *

 **/Thank you very much for reading the first chapter of 'We Can Do This…. Together.' Please review because the next chapter will be out soon! Thank you!**


	2. Determined To Find Him

**Warning:** This story will contain (I will give warning!) Male X Male situations. If you do not like it please don't read it.

 **ANOTHER WARNING: There will be death in this story. If you can not handle it I will put up a warning before it happens. And I shall tell when it over as well.**

 **Rated M:** Rated M for whenever the possible sexual situations come in. I don't want to get kicked off Fanfiction for putting the wrong rating.

 **Disclaimer:** I do NOT own any of the characters in this story. All ownership goes to the respected parties.

* * *

 _Chapter two:_ _Determined To Find Him_

 **Bucky's point of view**

Steve… Steve… Steve… Steve was the only thing Bucky Barnes could think about. He had lost Steve the day this happened and hadn't been able to find him since. He knew he was alive he had to be. Steve and Bucky always promised each other they were together until the end of the line. Well Bucky was still onboard and wasn't letting Steve get off of this train yet. He had to find him.

* * *

 _Bucky's Journal: Entry 1_

' _I found this notebook a few days back and decided I'd finally fill it up. It'll keep me from going crazy and help me remember all my thoughts._

 _My name is James Buchanan Barnes. I prefer to go by Bucky. My best Pal is Steve Rogers. We're inseparable well.. We were._

 _A few months ago our world got turned upside down and I've been living in this hell ever since. Each day it's a fight for my life against the undead. When this all happened I got separated from Steve and haven't been able to find him since._

 _ **That kid better be alive or I swear I'm gonna kick his undead ass!**_ _Hmph… I ain't got an eraser left and I'm not gonna waste more lead then I got. Alright so I should explain who I am yeah? That's usually how these things work in movies anyway._

 _I already told you my name it's Bucky. My best pal Steve and I have been friends since we were small. I'm the oldest out of my three other siblings. I got dark hair guess you could call it black or brown depending on the light._

 _Anyway if you don't know that the damn apocalypse is happening well lucky you. Alright so the day this happened…. I lost Steve, my little Stevie. Well he isn't so little anymore. And don't you dare call him Stevie while I'm still living. Only I can do that._

 _Besides that.. We promised each other if anything bad ever happened to meet at my Paw's old place he took us to during the Summers when we were little. It's in Washington D.C.._

 _You might think it would be easy to get there from Brooklyn but it ain't. There's no cars you have to walk all the way. It's pretty damn challenging when you have to avoid the undead the wants 'ta eat 'ya. God I just hope Steve is safe._

* * *

Bucky closed his notebook letting out a loud groan. He had no idea where the hell Steve could be or if he was even alive. But he was going to get to D.C. and wait for as long as it took for Steve to show up. If he ever did.

Bucky had no idea what Steve was going through, he also didn't know he was ahead of Steve on the way to D.C. far ahead. Bucky was just outside the border. He was sitting up in a tree writing in his notebook.

He had climbed up there to get away from a few of the undead following him, there were still some stragglers so he wasn't getting down just yet. Opening his notebook once more, Bucky begun to write again.

* * *

 _Bucky's Journal: Entry 2_

' _Alright let me tell you about my relationship with Steve.. It's... Complicated. The kid could have anyone he wants so I set him up on date after date but it never works. Sometimes I just.. I hope he'll tell me he doesn't like girls like other fellas do._

 _But I doubt it. To tell you the truth I go on dates too just to hopefully make him jealous.. Doesn't seem to be working. I got this thing for Steve I mean..We've known each other for years how could I not? I'm surprised he hasn't noticed and told me off yet._

 _Steve was raised pretty strict too. If you didn't like gals you weren't normal. But damn if likein' Steve ain't normal then I don't wanna be._

 _Sometimes it really pisses me off that he doesn't notice how I feel about him. Probably should'a said something before this all happened._

 _If I ever see him again I got 'ta tell him. I can't keep it hidden anymore. I'd rather get eaten by one of those things than go the rest of my life not having told him. The kids the apple of my eye. I love him to death._

 _Besides thinkin' about Stevie, which is all I really do. I'm worried about him._

 _I'm just sitting up in a tree waiting for some of them to clear out. I got caught in a horde this morning. Ran as far as I could before my legs started to burn. Found a nice big oak tree and climbed up as far as I could. Thankfully these brain dead idiots can't follow me._

 _There is only about five left now but it isn't safe to climb down just yet. I don't want to waste any more bullets than needed. I guess I could pass the time by telling you some of the recent days I had.. Yeah… Yeah I'll do that…. Let's start back a few days ago…'_

* * *

 _Bucky's Journal: Entry 3_

' _It happened just a few days back. I was running down the first part of the highway trying to get to D.C. yeah it has taken me a week to get this far. You have no idea the kind of things I have went through before this._

 _I wasn't paying attention to where I was walkin'._ _ **Steve would've called me out for that like he always does.**_ _I was busy playing with a locket in my hands. It was my Ma's. On one side is my Ma and Paw before all this happened. On the other is Steve and I. Ma always said he was like family so why not include him in her locket._

 _First let me tell you how I got the locket from her in the first place…._

 _When this all happened and the streets were filled with chaos I went to my Ma's place to make sure she was alright. It was to late though. Half her building was crawling with those things. I grabbed a metal pipe from the side of the building just to fight my way to her door. Thankfully unbitten._

 _Once I got to her door I found it open. I was terrified of what I might find, and I should have been. Not to be mean or anything but Steve is lucky his Ma and Paw passed long before this happened. What I saw… I never wanted to see anything like that ever._

 _The kitchen was covered in blood, I followed the groaning from her apartment. It seemed her neighbor tried to come over and help but only ended up being dinner on the floor… My Ma… She was bent over her neighbor with another one of those things and they were just… They were devouring her._

 _I did what I had to do… I smashed it's head in.. Then the neighbors.. Then...My Ma she.. She tried to come after me. I had to do it. I smashed her head in until she stopped moving. I was crying while doing it of course. How could I not? I saw the necklace hanging off her neck and just yanked it off and ran. I knew I had to get out of there before anything else came in…_

 _Back to the highway now. It was a bad idea to be looking at the picture of Steve while walking in an area like this. I straight up bumped into one of those things. I hit it full on! I was terrified it was so close to me. But thankfully I'm faster than some undead piece of meat. I pulled out my gun and shot it point blank._

 _But that was a bad idea. Should've used my knife. Before I knew it I had a horde chasing after me. I ran for a full day straight to get to this tree. It has been about three days of sitting in this tree, thankfully my bag has food and water in it. But I need to get down soon. I need to get to D.C. got to find Steve._

 _I'm coming to find you Stevie, just you wait.'_

* * *

Bucky shut his notebook and put it back into his bag. The few standing at the bottom of the tree got bored, or hungry, or whatever the hell they do and finally left. Slinging his bag over his shoulders Bucky jumped down onto the branch below, and the next, and the next, until he was off the tree and on the ground.

Looking around Bucky madesure he was in the clear before taking off down the highway. He was determined to make it to his Paw's house tonight no matter how many distractions he got. He had to make it just in case Steve was already there and waiting for him.

Not even a mile into his walk and Bucky was started to hear soft whining. He went to grab for his gun but stopped… Zombies don't.. Whine… Going around a car that he heard the whining from he saw a small black lab laying in the street.

Bucky slowly approached the dog holding out his hand. The dog cautiously sniffed it before giving him a lick. "Hey little guy.. You must be hungry."

Looking around Bucky made sure there was nothing around before kneeling down and pulling out some bread for the dog to eat. "Here you go little guy. Eat up." A smile came to Bucky's lips seeing the small dog eating hungrily at the bread he pulled out.

"I bet Steve would really like you, he always wanted a dog. I'm gonna call you Crook, 'cause you got a cute little crooked smile." Reaching out Bucky picked up the dog and unzipped his jacket. He tucked in the ends to his pants before putting the puppy inside and zipping it up slightly. That way he could run and the dog would be safe, plus the dog could look out of the jacket and still be comfortable.

"Come on Crook.. Let's go find Steve."

Bucky kept low but walked fast down the highway until finally, finally he got to the sign saying 'Welcome to Washington D.C.'. Now it was only a few more miles until he got to his Paw's place. But it seemed like that may be a problem. He knew D.C. had a high population but this was ridiculous. They were so many in the exact path he wanted to get to.

Reaching into his jacket he pet Crook to keep him calm. That's when he noticed all the undead were crowded around something, no… Someone. In the middle of the horde were several mangled bodies, he wished he could've helped but it was to late now. "I'm sorry" Bucky mumbled as he slowly maneuvered his way around the horde.

* * *

 _Bucky's Journal: Entry 4_

' _In this type of world you can't give anything a second thought. You hesitate to shoot? You're dead. You stop to think which way to turn instead of doing it? You're dead. You can't afford to waste anything. Save every drop of water, every crumb of food, because you never know when you'll find more._

 _I'm just glad my Paw was hoarding food. He was always paranoid about the end of the world. That's exactly why we're going to his special place in D.C. it's covered by a twelve inch thick, seven foot tall black gate. His windows are barred as well as the door._

 _He was real paranoid before he passed. I'm actually glad for it because now I can keep Steve safe or.. I could've if we hadn't been separated._

 _Paw used to bring us there as kids. He had his own power system and weapons. Filterin' his own water and air. He was prepared for everything.'_

* * *

Bucky had rounded the corner to his father's home and froze. The large driveway and yard were covered in the undead. "Fuck." He muttered softly. "We're gonna have to hop the fence Crook."

Looking up at the large fence Bucky took a deep breath and grabbed the bars. "Sorry Crook, you might get squished up a bit. Try and keep quiet for me."

Pushing himself up Bucky kept his feet against the bars and gripped tightly. It took him a while and a few tries but he managed to get over the fence without attracting to much attention.

"I hope they'll be gone by the time Steve gets here… And he better."

Pulling a key from around his neck Bucky opened the door a smile coming to his lips. "Finally…. Safe…."

Shutting the door, and locking it. Bucky put Crook down on the floor and went to find a bowl for his food and water. His father used to have a dog, and even if the food was stale for him it was still food.. Filling both bowls he pet the dog softly. "He'll show up buddy… If he doesn't I'll kill him myself." Bucky let out a sad laugh before standing up to go explore the large home.

Little did he know what Steve was about to go through.

* * *

 **/Please Reveiw! I don't know why it's harder to write chapters for Bucky yet I can write plenty for Steve.**


	3. I Was So Close

**Warning:** This story will contain (I will give warning!) Male X Male situations. If you do not like it please don't read it.

 **ANOTHER WARNING: There will be death in this story. If you can not handle it I will put up a warning before it happens. And I shall tell when it over as well.**

 **Rated M:** Rated M for whenever the possible sexual situations come in. I don't want to get kicked off Fanfiction for putting the wrong rating.

 **Disclaimer:** I do NOT own any of the characters in this story. All ownership goes to the respected parties.

* * *

 _Chapter three:_ _I Was So Close_

 **Steve's Point Of View**

"Bucky" Steve mumbled softly. "Bucky… Bucky!" He shot up his eyes opening quickly. Panting heavily a groan escaped his lips.

"Get it together Steve it was just a dream.. He's fine.. I hope.." Sighing softly Steve begun to gather his things into his bag, his nightmare had attracted some unwanted attention.

Since the Laura incident almost a week ago, Steve had gotten quite far despite all the detours and undead in his way. He was only about sixty miles outside of Washington D.C. he was almost there.

"I'll be there soon Buck… I promise…"

* * *

 _Steve's Journal: Entry 6_

' _When I had left the bell tower church everything was fine. I got at least ten miles out before I hit the highway. I knew there I wouldn't be safe. There was no cover and plenty of broken down cars and bodies. Number one rule I learned during this time… Never go into the woods unless it's life or death, because it could just be your death._

 _I got a good distance onto the highway before anything happened. First of all let me tell you what the highway looked like. It's your typical highway except all the cars with doors ajar or hoods up, even some are facing the wrong direction. It's hard to see past the hoods or trunks, and if you come to a truck that's the worst. Anything could be around it, or inside of it. I don't even want to get started on the mangled bodies laying around half eaten that you have to walk over. Ugh and the guts.. That stuff is hard to get off your boots._

 _I was being very careful not to touch any of the car doors or anything so none of the alarms would sound. I didn't want anyone to hear me, alive or not. You can't trust the living either, half the time they try to steal your food. I managed to get past a few of the undead without being seen._

 _I had found a sword in one of the buildings I went through a few days back. It has been real nice to have when you sneak up on one of those bastards and don't want to waste a bullet._

 _Anyway I was doing good so far, until I stopped looking down. I was trying my hardest not to make a noise, there were a few of them piled around a body_ _ **having their lunch together. :) Buck is gonna like that joke.**_ _I moved around a few cars but didn't pay attention to the ground._

 _Until I made a loud crunch. I wound up stepping on the remains of what could've been a woman. I wasn't paying much attention because I took off running from them. I just wanted to find Bucky, I hope he wasn't having it as bad as I was, or any worse._

 _I made a mistake in running I really did. I bumped into a few cars and set off their alarms. It only attracted more of them from god knows where. It only got worse from there. It went from being about five of them to what seemed more like five hundred now._

 _I was terrified, and then I fell. I fell over someone's remains. All I could think of was I was about to die. But if I died Buck would be all alone. I'd be a rotting corpse on a highway and Bucky would be all alone. I couldn't let that happen._

 _I pushed myself up and took off running, but not far. I couldn't keep going in the heat of the day when their smell was so bad it made me want to vomit worse then when I was younger and couldn't get over my colds._

 _I slid under a car and prayed to anyone who would listen that they not find me. My backpack lay heavy on my back, the sword on my hip, and the gun tight in my hand. I tried my hardest to control my breathing. If even one of them heard me it was all over.'_

* * *

Steve had been walking on little sleep and little to no food. But he couldn't stop now. Not when he was so close to Washington. Not when he was so close to Bucky.

Of course there would always be something in his way. On the last strip of highway that lead him to Washington there were about fifteen of the undead limping about around cars and trucks. Steve knew he couldn't take them all maybe one or two if he was lucky, but he wasn't and he was almost out of bullets. Steve had a few options.

Option one. He try to be as quiet as possible and hope he didn't get caught, which he probably will with his luck.

Option two: He make a distraction while he goes around them. He could throw something onto the other side of the highway that makes a lot of noise. That way anything around him will pay attention to it and not him.

Option three: Steve could be a complete idiot and try to take them on. Not his best chance and the survival rate is low. But he has to hurry before he gets caught.

Steve decided to go with his second option. It seemed like the best to him and it had a higher survival rate than the other two. Pulling off his bag Steve dug around until he found just what he was looking for. He knows it was dumb to keep a child's toy in his bag but he found and it didn't want to part with it.

In his hands was a wind up monkey, the ones with the cymbals. It was obnoxiously loud and he knew it would cause a distraction. Winding it up as far as it would go Steve threw it to the other side of the highway.

The second it hit the ground Steve hid behind a car door as the monkey begun to bang the cymbals together. It was the best choice as the undead limped towards the noise.

Quickly Steve took off careful not to make any extra noise or draw attention to himself. Making his way around cars and the remains that lay scattered across the highway he noticed a sign saying twenty miles until Washington.

* * *

 _Steve's Journal: Entry 7_

' _I was thankful not a soul heard me. The moment they passed I slid out from under the car and took off down the stretch of highway left to get me to Washington. Maybe once I find Bucky he'll have some survivors with him and we can all travel to the camp together. Or maybe we'll find some along the way._

 _Whatever happens I just hope everything turns out better than it is now. I know that it will._ _ **Whenever I'm with Bucky everything turns out alright.**_

 ** _The nights are cold and the mornings are hot._**

 ** _The nights are dark and the mornings are bright._**

 ** _Not a single soul sleeps at night._**

 ** _Not a single soul rests in the light._**

 _I've taken up to writing poems, even if they aren't good. I prefer drawing but even then I need something else to distract my mind._ _ **Besides thoughts of finding Bucky.**_ _Sometimes when I manage to sleep I have these dreams. Dreams of what it would be like if this never happened._

 _I wish I could go back, I'd do things so differently if I knew this was going to happen. Not only would I prepare for it but… I would've told him. I should've told him. I should have taken his hand that night and said we aren't going out. I should have sat him down and told him how I felt, even if it ruined everything between us._

 _I wish we hadn't been separated. I wish… I wish that I could just have told him._

 _But those things wont happen. For now I just have to focus on finding him at least.'_

* * *

Only twenty miles left he could do this. No he had to do it. His legs burnt, he was sure his arms were sun burnt, his stomach was cramping having not had food for three days. The only thing that kept him going was the thought of Bucky being all alone waiting for him.

* * *

Steve was just about to enter D.C. when he stopped completely. Tears begun to build in his eyes when he saw it. He was so close. So close to Bucky! In front of him just wandering the streets had to be at least fifty of them. There was no way he could get around them without being noticed. But he had to, for Bucky. The problem is… He doesn't know how.

Steve took a deep breath. Maybe if he ran fast enough he could… No that's a horrible idea and the chance of survival is to low. He doesn't wanna risk it.

Maybe if he just…

Quickly Steve ducked down as he heard heavy footsteps. What he saw he could only thank whomever was watching over him for it. There was a woman running straight through the horde as fast as she could.

Of course he wanted to help her but he knew it was a lost cause. But thankfully it got the attention of most of them. Quickly Steve got up and ran down the road as fast as he could. He made it down a few streets before the noise of his boots attracted attention. "No.. No please no."

He couldn't spare a second glance, the numbers were only growing. And he wasn't even close to the house yet. But he had to keep going, it was that or die. Turning the corner he quickly took another right to avoid more of them. "Buck.. I'm coming."

* * *

Running up to the house Steve's worst fear came true. Not only was there a horde quickly approaching behind him but there were at least twenty of them in front of him on the lawn. Looking around quickly Steve ran over to one of the large oak trees. He was never the best at climbing but he had to do it. It was life or death.

Getting up as high as he could Steve let tears trickle down his cheeks. This was it. Now he would never get to see Bucky again. Except…

Except there was a light on inside. A light! Bucky was there! He was inside waiting for Steve! "BU-!" Steve covered his mouth quickly. If he yelled for Bucky it would only attract more of them. That would only make it impossible for Bucky to rescue him.

But how would he now anyway? There was between at least sixty to eighty below him and there was no way Bucky could take out that many on his own. Clinging to the tree Steve closed his eyes tightly. He was so close. So fucking close and yet Bucky was so far away! If only Bucky would look outside.

"I love you…" Steve whispered to himself. Bucky couldn't hear him anyway, and it seemed like there was no way to get out of this one. It looked like the end for him…. Or is it?

* * *

 **/Ohhhh what's gonna happen to our little Stevie? If he gonna die? You'll have to wait and see! Please Review if you wanna know!** *Sigh* **I make Steve have such a hard time.**

 **Did you like my little poem I made? It's completely lame yeah?**


	4. Steve Is It Really You?

**Warning:** This story will contain (I will give warning!) Male X Male situations. If you do not like it please don't read it.

 **ANOTHER WARNING: There will be death in this story. If you can not handle it I will put up a warning before it happens. And I shall tell when it over as well.**

 **Rated M:** Rated M for whenever the possible sexual situations come in. I don't want to get kicked off Fanfiction for putting the wrong rating.

 **Disclaimer:** I do NOT own any of the characters in this story. All ownership goes to the respected parties.

 **I got asked if Crook was going to die. Hell no I'm not a monster I don't kill dogs.**

* * *

 _Chapter Four: Steve...Is It Really You?_

 **Bucky's Point Of View**

Bucky had taken a little walk through the large house. Crook followed him the whole way excitedly. "This is my room Crook. Though Steve and I might share it. When we were kids whenever we got scared we'd sleep in each other's bed. I don't think I could be without him again. I'd be to scared to wake up and he not be there."

A groan escaped Bucky's lips. "Look at me.. Talking to a dog.." He smiled reaching down to pet Crook with his real arm. "But you're a good listener."

* * *

Bucky's father's house was rather large. It was three storeys tall with two more storeys in the basement.

The first storey had the living room, kitchen, dining area, typical household things.

The second storey has four bedrooms on the left side. Each has its own bathroom and shower. On the right side is various rooms. One of the rooms is a study, the other is a small sitting room with several bookshelves. The third room is a stock room it is full of toilet paper, tissues, dry and canned foods, even extra clothing and towels. The fourth room on the second floor is locked. Neither of the boys have ever been allowed to go in. At the end of the hallway is another locked door, but it is painted black unlike the other white doors.

On the third floor is the weapons stock, a bigger food stock, the power system, and air filtration. Bucky's father had it all set out.

The basement was like a separate miniature underground home. It was in case of tornados or earthquakes. It was a safe room.

* * *

While walking the house Bucky started to hear the groaning growing louder and louder outside. "I guess they found out I'm here, huh Crook?"

"Where'd you go boy?" Bucky looked around before he heard Crook barking from downstairs. That's when he heard a voice, or he thought he did. Walking over to the window on the hall of the second floor Bucky peeked out. He froze at what he saw. "Steve!"

His breathing grew rapid as fear overtook him. Below Steve was a still growing horde of zombies. Opening the window Bucky used his metal arm to break off the bars. It was the second story, it's not like they could climb anyway. "Steve!" Bucky called out shaking in fear. He wouldn't let his best pal die when they were so close to being together.

Opening his eyes Steve had a bright smile come to his face, it was the most beautiful thing Bucky had ever seen. "Buck! Buck I'm.. I'm sorry. I couldn't make it." Steve looked like he was about to cry. Bucky hadn't seen him like that since his Ma passed a while back.

"No.. No don't say that Stevie look you made it. You're here alright. All you gotta do is listen to me alright?" Steve nodded gripping the tree tighter. "Can you get onto the branch across from you? I promise you're safe. I'm not gonna let you get hurt when you're so close."

Steve looked uncertain but he trusted Bucky. Climbing over to the branch that hung over the fence he gripped the tree as tight as he could. "N-N-Now what Buck?"

"Now you just got to relax Stevie alright? You gotta trust me on this one. I need you to jump." Steve looked terrified.

"JUMP!? You want me to jump!?"

"Stevie.. Please Steve trust me. I wont let you get hurt. I'm gonna catch you I promise you. Just hold out your arms for me and jump as far as you can. I will not let you fall!"

Steve took a deep shaky breath before moving to the edge of the branch. "You let me fall and I'll hate you for the rest of my life."

Bucky let out a soft laugh. "I wont. I'll never let go Steve." He smiled and leaned out the window holding out his hands. "Just trust me and jump."

Steve was hesitant as he put his feet on the unsteady branch. "Steve you have to jump now! It's gonna break!"

As the cracking grew louder Steve jumped holding out his arms. "STEVE!"

* * *

Steve had closed his eyes before jumping, the same time the branch broke too. Bucky was terrified he wasn't going to make it. But Steve always pulls through, and at the last second their hands touched Bucky clamped his metal hand around Steve's and held on for dear life.

"Stevie look! Look you're alright. Open your eyes please." Steve slowly opened his eyes. His other hand quickly coming up to grab onto Bucky's. "I've got you Stevie. I'm not letting go I promise."

It took a few minutes but Bucky managed to pull Steve into the house. Steve fell on top of Bucky clinging to him. He began to sob into Bucky's shirt gripping him tightly. "Shh it's alright Steve I've got you. Let it all out."

Bucky may have been putting on a strong face but tears were swelling in his eyes as well. He had missed Steve so much. Hearing Steve whisper his name through the tears made his own dam break. Suddenly the two were a crying mess clinging to each other on the hallway floor.

"Bucky!"

"Steve!"

The two were sniffling wetting each others shirts with their tears. "I'm so sorry Stevie. I should have…. Should've never lost sight of you. I.. I.. I should've grabbed your hand the second it all went crazy. Should'a ran with you here together." He was trying to calm his breathing while rubbing small circles on Steve's back.

"B-Bucky! Bucky I hate you! I-I hate you!" He was shaking in the others arms.

"No you don't.. You could never hate me." They both went silent until they broke out in laughter. Reaching up Bucky wiped away Steve's tears. Steve looking into Bucky's eyes a blush coming to his cheeks. Slowly Steve got up helping the other up.

"Bucky… I've missed you. I.. I almost died far to many times without you."

Bucky shook his head putting his hand on Steve's shoulder. "I'm not gonna let you die Steve.. You're with me until the end of the line remember? I'm not letting you get off this train just yet." The two smiled at each other before Bucky reached over to shut the window.

"You hungry? This place is stocked!"

Steve laughed nodding. "Starving. I haven't eaten in three days."

Bucky was shocked. "We need to feed you then come on!"

* * *

Bucky had made Steve chicken noodle soup the way his mother used to when they were both upset or sick. Being as hungry as he was Steve ate most of it. That was until he was distracted by the barking. "You have a dog?!"

Bucky's face lit up once more. "Yeah I found him! Thought you'd love to have him around. His name is Crook." Bucky nudged the food bowl which sent Crook running into the kitchen. Kneeling down Bucky picked up the pup.

"Crook this is Steve." He held out the small puppy which Steve took excitedly.

"He's so cute Buck!" A yawn escaped Steve's lips as he set the dog down in his lap.

"Tired? Me too. Hey… Would..Would you mind if we shared a bed?"

Steve laughed softly looking to Bucky with tired eyes. "I was gonna ask you that. I'm scared I'll wake up in the morning and it'll all just be a dream." Bucky's smile dropped as he walked over holding out his hand.

"Come on gimme your bag. The room is upstairs. Shower in the morning, I don't think you have enough energy for that right now."

Steve nodded and gave up his bag to hold the dog instead. Slowly Bucky lead him upstairs and into their room. The second Steve hit the mattress he was asleep. It gave Bucky time to write in his journal.

* * *

 _Bucky's Journal: Entry 5_

' _It happened today! Not only did I arrive at the house this very morning but less than an hour ago Steve showed up. Don't have a clue how he made it here in the dark and I'm to scared to ask._

 _I found him outside in a tree surrounded by a horde of zombies. It terrified me to see him like that. I thought he was going to die and all I could think of was he needed to jump. No matter what I would catch him I had to. And I did._

 _Now that I have him I'll never let Steve go. I don't want to lose him again._ _ **Steve is my everything and I can't give that up again.**_ _Steve is to important to me, he's my best pal._

 _Now that I think about it he had a bag with him too. I wonder if he has a journal inside or something. Sorry Steve… But I have to take a look.'_

* * *

Bucky quietly reached over and picked up Steve's bag. Opening it he smiled seeing a journal. "Let's see what you lived through Stevie." He whispered to himself before pulling out the journal and opening to the first page.

Bucky was shocked to say the least. He didn't think Steve liked him so much like he did. Let alone loved him since they were kids. Not only was he shocked but he was extremely happy. Finally Steve could be his but…

Steve has gone through a lot. He's had to shoot a woman in front of her child. Maybe he could tease Steve a little first, he knows Steve could use it. A little flirting never hurt anyone. Well it never hurt Steve anyway. He should know he's done it often enough.

Shutting the journal Bucky had a little game in mind. See how long Steve could take his flirting before he said or did anything. He just still couldn't believe it. All these years and their feelings were the same, yet neither of them knew about the other.

* * *

 _Bucky's Journal: Entry 6_

' _It's probably wrong of me to look through his journal.. Most likely definitely wrong of me but I couldn't help it. And what I found out was definitely worth it. All these years of loving Steve and thinking he didn't feel the same he did._

 _Steve has loved me since we were kids and I never knew it! Just like he doesn't have a clue how I feel about him. I feel like we're both a bunch of idiots. How the hell have we both been in love with each other and neither of us had a clue? How dumb can we be?_ _ **God Steve I think someone upstairs just loves messing with us.**_ _I think I'm gonna play a little game with him. You know tease him a little, flirt with him like crazy. He'll think he's just imagining it. I want him to either tell me or act on it. I'm more likely to chicken to tell him. Even if I know it already I'm still to scared to admit it to him. I just… Ugh I need sleep.'_

* * *

Bucky closed his journal and put Steve's away. It has been a long time since he has slept on a mattress. He's gonna enjoy this. Curling one arm around Steve, Bucky had a bright smile on his lips as he pulled the covers over them. His smile didn't fade as he fell asleep.

* * *

 **/Yay Stevie didn't die! Please Review for more!**


	5. I I I Lo-

**Warning:** This story will contain (I will give warning!) Male X Male situations. If you do not like it please don't read it.

 **ANOTHER WARNING: There will be death in this story. If you can not handle it I will put up a warning before it happens. And I shall tell when it over as well.**

 **Rated M:** Rated M for whenever the possible sexual situations come in. I don't want to get kicked off Fanfiction for putting the wrong rating.

 **Disclaimer:** I do NOT own any of the characters in this story. All ownership goes to the respected parties.

 **There is a (sort of…. Not really) sexual situation in this chapter!**

* * *

 _Chapter Five: Bucky I… I...I lo-_

 **Steve's Point Of View**

 _Steve's Journal: Entry 8_

' _I managed to get to the house last night but not without trouble. I was followed by about eighty of those disgusting creatures. Thankfully after climbing in a tree Bucky managed to see me. He wouldn't have known I was there without Crook, that's the dog he found by the way….. He found it for me._ _ **God I love him.**_

 _I was terrified in that tree. But I trusted Bucky and jumped from the branch. Of course he caught me I didn't doubt him I have to much trust for him. I cried against him for a while though. I thought it would be embarrassing but he cried to._

 _I couldn't help it I missed him so much and to see him alive and unhurt… I couldn't stop the tears. They weren't even from almost dying they were from seeing Bucky alive and well._ _ **He means everything to me.**_ _'_

* * *

Steve woke up alone in the bed. At first he was terrified that it had all been a dream, but then how would he have gotten to the bed? Then he thought maybe he dreamed Bucky was alive. But then how would he have gotten inside? His thoughts were interrupted as the door opened.

Bucky walked in in his.. In his boxers. That sent a deep red blush to Steve's cheeks. It's not like he hadn't seen Bucky naked before or anything it's just… It has been so long and Bucky has changed so much.

"Morning Stevie I brought up breakfast. Thought you might be to tired to move." Steve smiled sitting up slowly. Bucky had made eggs, toast, bacon, sausage, everything Steve loved.

"Morning Buck. God I feel great after sleeping on a mattress again." Steve stretched out a yawn escaping his lips. Bucky climbed onto the bed and sat next to Steve, the tray between them.

"Well let's eat up. You need a shower I bet. I took one yesterday after making sure the house was secure."

Steve nodded listening to Bucky while he dug into the breakfast. A moan escaped his lips as he took a bite of the hot food. "God this is great Buck!" Bucky just smiled as he watched Steve eat happily.

* * *

It had been a while since anything was even close to normal for either of them. But this.. Being in this home. Being safe. It was something they had to get used to all over again. Each little noise made them both jump and reach for their guns. Steve didn't even care if they did get attacked, as long as he still had Bucky with him.

After a nice long hot shower Steve was sitting on the couch with Bucky. His head against the others arm as he held Crook in his lap. "Buck… I was thinking about something while in the shower." Bucky looked over his hand frozen in Steve's hair. It was a habit that helped them both relax.

"I was thinking about this camp near Chicago. I heard it was pretty secure and not a single dead were able to get in. Do you think… Maybe we could go there? Together?"

Bucky smiled letting his fingers run through Steve's hair again. "Yeah Steve.. Anywhere you wanna go. Anywhere you wanna look for help. I'll go with you. I'm not leaving you again Steve. Ever, I promise."

Steve smiled snuggling closer to Bucky. That's when Bucky decided to start teasing.

"You know you look so adorable curled up like that Stevie. I bet any gal would just love to to run her hands up your bare thighs." Bucky reached over slowly tracing his fingers over Steve's thighs. He loved the blush that came to Steve's cheeks, and the way Steve shivered from his touch.

"B-Buck quit it. That's weird." He bat away Bucky's hand a pout coming to his lips.

"Aw come on kid don't be like that." Steve turned away trying not to laugh. "Come on the kitchen needs cleaning, how 'bout we do it like we used to at Ma's place?"

With his pout still in place Steve put down Crook and got up heading for the kitchen. "Aww come on kid talk to me." Still Steve didn't say a word. Letting out a sigh Bucky got up heading for the kitchen.

The two did the dishes side by side. Bucky washing and Steve drying. They didn't need to use any more water than necessary so they chose not to use the dishwasher. It was quiet for sometime until..

"Bucky!" Steve cried out looking at the others metal arm. Looking down Bucky had on a deep scowl as a knife was embedded between the plates on his hand.

"Buck you need to be more careful." Steve slowly took the metal hand into his, carefully he removed the knife. He knew how much Bucky hated his arm. Yet Bucky never once blamed Steve for it, even though he felt it was his fault.

* * *

If they had just been a little more careful climbing the construction site everything would have been fine. But it wasn't. They had to have been six storeys up when Bucky lost his footing on a piece of plywood. He fell right through the floor and down to the ground. Along the way his arm got cut up on metal that was hanging out, his bone was showing by the time he landed on it.

It had scared Steve worse than he was now during the apocalypse. He thought Bucky had died, he hadn't responded each time Steve called for him. By the time he got down there Bucky was covered in blood. He called the hospital while trying to get Bucky to respond to him.

The doctors hadn't been able to save Bucky's arm after everything. Steve knew it was all his fault. He was the one who suggested they got into the construction site. He was the one who didn't move quick enough to catch Bucky.

Of course they replaced his arm with the metal one but Bucky absolutely hated it, even tried ripping it off several times. The only reason he stopped was because of Steve. Because he knew he could protect Steve better with this arm.

After he was released from the hospital Steve spent every night at Bucky's house trying to make him feel better. He kept insisting it was his fault but Bucky kept claiming it wasn't. He tried everything to make Bucky better. Everyday he could hold Bucky's new arm and trace patterns over it. He would tell Bucky how great it made him look. Sometimes Bucky even woke up with a design or two painted on his arm. They never stayed long though the paint always washed away.

Soon Bucky got used to his new arm, but he still hated it. He just stopped trying to rip it off every chance he got. He kept telling Steve it wasn't his fault, that he knew Steve would always be there to catch him. But that didn't help, he still felt responsible.

* * *

"Sorry." Bucky mumbled. Steve looked up gripping the others hand tightly, even if he couldn't feel it.

"Buck… Buck don't be like that please." When he got no answer Steve slowly let go. He knew Bucky would be like this for a while. "I'll let you finish alright? I'm just gonna head upstairs."

When Steve got no answer he put down the rag and went upstairs to their bedroom. He hated when Bucky got like this. Grabbing his bag he pulled out his journal.

* * *

 _Steve's Journal: Entry 9_

' _Being with Bucky is like being home again before all this started. I feel… I feel safe with Bucky._

 _Except I hate when things go wrong._

 _We were washing dishes together like how we used to at his Ma's place. Except a knife got stuck in one of his platings on his hand. This is why I always try and wash. He got real quiet and was just staring at his hand. It hurts me to see him like that because he's always remembering how he'll never feel anything with that hand again. How inhuman it is._

 _He wont even let me take the blame for it.'_

* * *

Steve stopped writing when he spotted something smudged against the pages of his notebook. It looked almost like the plating on Bucky's fingers but no.. Bucky wouldn't have gone through his thing.. Would he?

Shaking off the thought Steve went to put his notebook away when he noticed something. Instead of putting his notebook on the dresser Bucky accidentally put it in Steve's bag as well. Pulling it out Steve listened for any footsteps that might mean Bucky was coming upstairs. He knew it was wrong to look through Bucky's journal but if Bucky went through his and saw what he meant to Steve… Steve wanted to know what he meant to Bucky.

Slowly Steve opened the notebook. As much as he wanted to read it he was scared of what Bucky had to say. His fears quickly vanished as he read over everything Bucky had to say. So he felt the same way? Steve's heart begun to feel as if it would burst.

But then he got to the last page. So that's what this afternoon was about? He was teasing Steve, trying to get him to say something. Well two could play that game. With a smile on his lips Steve put the notebook back before opening his once more.

* * *

 _Steve's Journal: Entry 10_

' _I read it Buck… I read your journal just as you did mine. Yeah it's pretty obvious you read it you know. You left platted smudges all over my pages. But you wanna play games? I see how it is. You're on mister 'apple of my eye'. :)_

 _I'm not going to be the first to crack -Steve.'_

* * *

Shutting the notebook and leaving it on the bed for Bucky to find Steve got up to head downstairs once more. "Buck?" Steve looked around finding Bucky still standing in the kitchen near the sink.

Walking over cautiously Steve let his hand slide over Bucky's metal one. "Buck?" As soon as Steve's hand covered the metal Bucky snapped from his thoughts looking to Steve.

"Sorry pal I.. Sorry." Steve let a smile come to his lips hearing Bucky's apology.

"No Buck it's fine. Why dont you let me finish up here? Go upstairs and get a nap, or a shower just go relax alright?"

Bucky nodded letting a sigh escape his lips. "Yeah.. A shower sounds nice." He slowly pulled back from Steve, heading for the stairs. "I wont take long. How 'bout you get a movie started?"

Steve nodded heading to the cabinet a smirk on his lips, he already had a plan forming.

* * *

 **Bucky's Point Of View**

Walking into the bedroom Bucky noticed Steve's notebook on the bed, a smile slowly came to his lips. Had Steve been writing about him again? Reaching over he flipped open the notebook to the newest page.

Bucky's smile begun to fade as he read about Steve blaming himself. But then it came back ten times bigger as he read about Steve reading his journal. Sure he was a bit embarrassed but now Steve was in on his game. Snickering Bucky looked to the door. "You're on kid." He spoke to himself as he walked to the bathroom for a nice hot shower. The thoughts of what Steve could be planning ran through his mind as he stripped down.

* * *

 **-Sort of (not really) sexual situation warning!-**

As Bucky stepped under the hot water a soft moan escaped his lips, he was glad his arm was waterproof or that would have made his mood worse.

Running his fingers through his hair Bucky couldn't draw his thoughts away from Steve. The way that delectable, not so little, bubble butt bounced with each step. The way he licks his full pink lips. And the way he spoke his name in his sleep, so soft, so sweet. That alone could make Bucky, or even anyone hard in a second.

Suddenly Bucky realized what he had done. He should have kept his thoughts off of Steve. He didn't want to waste to much water, it took energy for it to be filtered again. But he couldn't very well tell Steve not to come into the room while he masturbates now could he?

Biting his bottom lip Bucky peaked out the shower to make sure he had locked the bathroom door. Taking a deep breath Bucky leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes. If Steve got him into this mess in the first place he'd get him out of it.

Bucky's thoughts drifted to that sinful mouth. The way Steve licked his lips, his pout, his smile. What it would feel like to have that mouth around his cock. Though his thoughts were quite vivid he wished he could feel the real thing.

A groan escaped Bucky's lips as his thumb slid over the head of his cock. "Nnn Steve."

 **-Warning Over-**

Suddenly a loud bang jarred Bucky from his thoughts. Turning off the shower he didn't stop to grab a towel before he ran from the bathroom drenching the floor in the process. Running down the stairs he grabbed the railing quickly before slipping. "Steve!"

* * *

 **Steve's Point Of View**

Steve was laughing softly as he poked his head out from the kitchen. "Sorry Buck the oven door slammed. You were taking a while so I was making some-..." A deep blush came to Steve's cheeks seeing Bucky naked. Of course he had seen Bucky naked before but this.. Now he knew how Bucky felt about him, and he was standing there dripping wet with a erection.

Seeing Steve's reaction Bucky looked down a deep blush coming to his cheeks. "Oh Steve I uh.. I.." Looking around Bucky grabbed the throw off the couch covering himself quickly. "What um.. What were you making?"

Steve turned back to the kitchen quickly. "I made uh.. Just some spaghetti pie. You should.. You should go get dressed if you want some."

"Yeah.. Yeah I'll do that." Bucky quickly ran back up the stairs. Once he left Steve let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding. He had just seen Bucky naked, wet, but the thing that got him was Bucky's erection.

' _Bucky.. He and I.. We feel the same about each other does that mean?... Was he thinking of me?_ '

Shaking off the thought he got to work cleaning the kitchen. When Bucky came back down Steve let a smile come to his lips seeing his best friend in such tight jeans. "I have a plate for you sitting on the-."

"I'm sorry." Bucky interrupted walking over to grab his plate from the kitchen island. "I didn't.. I didn't mean for you to see that. I just heard a loud noise in the shower and I thought the worst. I should have grabbed a towel or some pa-."

"Bucky shut up." He turned around facing Bucky. "I'm not upset. Buck you know how I feel about you and.. Well… You looked good. I mean I've seen you naked before but.." Steve laughed softly as he rubbed the back of his head. "I've never seen you like that. Nor have I really even taken the time to look."

Putting down the dishes he walked over grabbing the front of Bucky's shirt. "Bucky you.. You know that I.. I.. I lo-."

Steve's words were cut off as Bucky pulled him forward crushing their lips together in a deep passionate kiss. They had both been through hell to get where they are now, he wasn't going to waste another second.

When the two broke apart for some much needed air Steve let his arms wrap around Bucky's neck. "Bucky I.."

"Marry me Stevie."

His eyes widened looking up at his best friend. "Well damn Buck. You could at least ask me out first but…" A bright smile came to his face. Seeing it all Bucky could think was ' _During all this hell and the kid still has the brightest smile on his face… That's why I love 'im._ '

"But… You know we've been through so much already. Find a damn priest in all this and I'll gladly marry you." He placed a soft kiss to his best friend, now lover's lips.

"Really? You'd marry me?" Bucky wrapped his arms around Steve's waist leading him to the couch. "You better punk, don't go backing out at the last second. Apocalypse or not it's a permanent thing."

"I'd never dream of backing out jerk. I just hope you don't get cold feet on me."

The two laughed together. Sitting down Bucky pulled Steve into his lap. As Steve leaned back Bucky placed a soft kiss against his lover's lips.

"I love you Steve."

"I love you too Bucky… But the spaghetti is going to get cold"

* * *

 _Steve's Journal Entry: 11_

' _I know Bucky is just going to read this anyway but I have no problem with that now. I want to continue this journal so everyone knows my story. Knows our story Bucky. You're gonna continue yours too._

 _Alright so… I saw Bucky naked today. All I could think of was…_ _ **My god he's amazing.**_ _Wow._

 _Oh shut up you haven't seen him soaking wet running from a shower with that.. That… With a damn baseball bat hanging from his legs! And I mean.. It had started to go down when he got down the stairs so imagine that thing at its full length! Sorry Buck but wow.. I never really looked at you when we undressed before. I didn't want you to know about how I felt but well…_

 _No need to hide that now. Buck and I both feel the same for each other. We sort of well… We kissed a few times. I tried to tell him how I felt, not that he doesn't know already but the most wonderful thing happened. He asked me to marry him!_

 _Yes I know you're probably thinking that's the dumbest idea during a zombie apocalypse but… No… If I die I want it to be as Bucky's husband. As his. And he as mine. There is no other way I'd like to go. And… If something were to happen and I know you won't like this Bucky but.. I need you to be the one to put me down if it does. You're the only one I trust._

 _I love you Bucky. Now you and the world know it too. Hurry up and find that priest for me will you?'_

* * *

 **/Hey guys! I know I haven't updated in like a month or so but I've had a lot of personal issues. Plus school will be starting up again in about threeish weeks. Forgive me though I'll try to update as soon as possible! As always PLEASE REVIEW! And yes... I do realize this chapter is sort of crappy.**


	6. Added to- IMPORTANT UPDATE

**JUST LETTING EVERYONE KNOW THIS STORY IS NOW ON AO3 UNDER THE SAME NAME AND MY SAME USERNAME. ON A03 IT HAS BEEN EDITED MORE AND THINGS ADDED INTO THE STORY.**

 **Sadly not and update :(**

 _ **BUT**_ **\- I am currently working on an update and will hopefully have one up soon. I realize I haven't updated in like a year but I am going to be continuing and finishing this story. I've just had a lot going on. Finally graduated, working so much, and just a bunch of person stuff. BUT THIS STORY WILL GO ON! I will use every spare moment I have to work on this story. Warning though... It's going to be a roller coaster from here on out.**


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